Surviving Hurricane Pop Culture

This past week something unprecedented happened here in Oslo.  Four, major North American icons descended upon town (Not to mention the 50,000 crazed Norwegians that packed Valle-Hovin for a Metallica show on the preceding Wednesday).  Kanye West, Jay-Z, Justin Bieber, and Hillary Rodham Clinton (yes, she still counts as an icon).  To make matters even crazier, Oslo was the epicenter for one of the most widespread public sector strikes in years which saw "over 300 police officers" pulled.  That may not seem like such a high number, by its self, but, when put in perspective (there's only 11,000 employees in the Police Service... for the WHOLE COUNTRY), it's downright staggering.

So yes... things were a little crazy here.

Oslo had a severe case of Bieber Fever

Here's a quick, run back to how it all went down.

MONDAY


While those of you back in the US celebrated Memorial Day (Or, as it should be known in Europe, "You're welcome" Day... Joking! Joking!  Calm down), here in Oslo, Watch the Throne day fell on the state church holiday of "Pentecost".  Things were relatively quiet around town as people took advantage of the three day weekend and splendid weather to go to their cabins in the country-side or down to the beaches in the Oslo Fjord.  Norwegians love for getting out into nature combined with the advantageous concert location (Telenor Arena... located in the Fornebu region of Greater Oslo.  Which is as close to the heart of the city like Fed Ex Field is to downtown DC, Candlestick Park is to downtown San Francisco) lead to a relatively non-influenced day.  There was extra traffic and people congestion down by the National Theatre area as it was tipped off that that's where the two stars were staying in a hotel there (maybe the two floors of blocked out rooms was a giveaway).  There concert went off without much incident (No excessive repetition of songs) and they were able to get out of town.  Which, as it turned out, would be for the best

TUESDAY


Maybe I'm out of touch with popular culture (ok... I am out of touch with popular culture), but I had NO idea just how big Justin Bieber had become, especially here in Norway.  Before his plane could touch down at Oslo International (Gardermoen is not exactly JFK or Dulles), thousands were camped out waiting to just get a view of their idol.  Things only got more nuts as the day continued.  My bus had to go through the heart of the Bieberness (Jerbanetorget... the central station and right next to the hotel the Biebs was staying).  What was normally a 20 minute ride was rendered into an hour slog as an inordinate number of people and cars were literally parked out on the streets around the area hoping to see Bieber.  How bad was the situation?  Bieber had to be airlifted from the hotel to a floating stage behind the Opera house in the harbor where he was to perform.  Were there a lot of fans there waiting?

Yes.

How bad did it get?  They almost called a "State of Emergency".

Things only got more bananas after the show, when young Justin tried to move through the streets toward a scheduled press conference and all hell broke loose amongst the thousands of excited, teenage girls

Now, besides the fact that there are quite a few guys chasing the cars, the shocking lack of police cannot be overstated.  They underestimated well... everything.  The result were over 45 people injured in the melee and one cancelled press conference.  Oh, by the way, when I was attempting to come home well after this whole scene at around 11pm, it still took nearly double the normal time.  Bieber FTW.

FRIDAY


Well, Hillary seems happy to be here.  I asked a handful of people through the street and around the Royal Palace what their thoughts were about the Secretary of State coming through (she was handing out "thanks a lot!" for NATO support, as opposed to other countries who didn't contribute as much as others *cough* Germany *cough*).  The answers I got were really insightful:

"She's here?  Like now?"
"I wish it was her husband instead."
"Is Obama coming, too?  No? Oh..."

That's right, world... Oslo has taken your best shot from the celebrity world and, like a erstwhile, British orphan, they're asking for some more.  Bring on the POTUS!  Norway is ready...

Alt for Norge

17.5

May 17th is sorta an important day in Norway... ok, ok, ok.  It's THE MOST important day in Norway.  Since Norway has always been, more or less, an independent nation (or rather grouping of marauding Vikings... whichever term you prefer), it treats the day the Constitution (or most recent iteration of their government) was signed (1814, if you're keeping track at home) as their day to celebrate all things Norway.  Ever since I arrived here, I have been, constantly, told that "nothing compares to it" that it is amazing and quite the spectacle (in a good way).

You know what?  It was a pretty dope affair.

The first thing that caught my attention were the parades... oh, the parades.  There were three altogether.  Children's, Adult, and Military.  We opted for the children's version and were witness to ALL the children of Oslo.  Oslo is a little smaller than Baltimore (or Seattle) so, as you can imagine, that's a lot of kids.  They each had the banner from their school, or social group, and each kid was waving a flag.  The parade route went all the way to the Royal Palace where the King, himself, greeted each participant from his balcony several stories up.  The crowd joined in singing along to the national anthem (seriously, that thing has like a dozen verses) and random shouts of "hip hip hooray!".  In the distance, the Akers Fortress cannon fired off a few dozen times to let us know that the celebration was on.

As you can see in my video, there were a lot of people here to see the parade and celebrate the National Day.  It felt like every person in the greater Oslo area turned up and I can, honestly, say that there have been few other events I have attended where there were more people.

Another fun part of the day is that its tradition to eat ice cream and sausages.  Fine by me, after about ten minutes, I had a strawberry ice cream in one hand and a sausage in potato wrap in the other standing shoulder to shoulder with my new countrymen.  Many of them had on the traditional bunad while, a lot like me, were just in suits (though, other traditional clothing was welcome... there were a fair amount of dashikis).

This guy won the award for best bunad... oh, I'm mean mugging someone who cut in front of my picture... Norwegians can be jerks

Though, the highlight of the day (ok... one of the highlights.  The Russ impromptu dance party was pretty awesome, too.  I promise to write an article about that on Friday) was attending an international function after the parade.  There was free champagne and really good finger food (really, REALLY good shrimp).  Oh, did I mention the champagne was free?

Altogether, it really gave me some perspective on this odd nation.  Sure, Norwegians may be reserved and inwardly focused, but they love their own country and coming together to celebrate it.  While I still feel somewhat apart from this place and have questions than answers, at times, I understand celebrating your history and hopes for the future.  Seeing all the other people, of various ethnic backgrounds, gave me a sense that there was room here for everyone willing to do their part.  I look forward to my next May 17th and I hope that it happens here in Oslo.

Alt for Norge

The 'Vanger and a good-bye

I know I usually make new posts on Friday, but, due to traveling we're going to pretend like today is Friday (I'm sure many of you wish that was the case).  So what's new?  Oh, I spent the weekend in Stavanger (or, as I like to call it, the 'Vanger).

That may be the entire population of the 'Vanger in this picture!

It was a pleasant flight (around an hour) in which I learned that "Never Let Me Down" is the best Kanye West song (Spotify!!!).  Very important information.

Anyway, the 'Vanger is a sleepy, coastal town (The most reoccurring, apt description of it that came to me was "a beach town without a beach", but, as it was later pointed out, there were small beaches all around... so there's that).  It also has a lot of diversity (by Norwegian standards), and its reflected all throughout the city.  Despite the fact that it has over 100,000 people, it never felt like more than a few hundred, but it didn't take an inordinate amount of time to go to any point in town.  Unfortunately, bad weather kept me from going out to Pulpit Rock, which is a real shame as I'm told that its better than the Grand Canyon (strangely, none of the Norwegians who told me this had been to the Grand Canyon, but, since I didn't make it to the PR, I can't weigh in, either).

Cannonballs are strongly discouraged

That's pretty much all there is to say about... oh, right.  They have a bit of oil.   Ok.  A lot of oil.  So much, in fact, that its drawn a lot of international companies (most notably, Haliburton and ConocoPhillips) as well as "international, sister cities" (which, I think is akin to having followers on Twitter).

However, it wasn't all ballerific.  As I previously mentioned, the hundred thousand or so 'vangerians are spread out, but, unlike in Oslo, there wasn't much in the way of public transportation to connect them.  Which meant a lot of driving and taxis (which escalated in price quite quickly).  Also, as previously mentioned in this space, the North Sea goes hammer and that means unseasonable weather... How unseasonable? you may ask...

It snowed.

Multiple times.

It wasn't a rarity, either.

All I could think about was my last post (how's this for irony, almost the entirety of last week here in Oslo had 70+ fahrenheit temperature... seems my blog questions get answered!) and realize that I never had it so well...

Remember to "like" me on Facebook (Facebook.com/OSLOst).

Sorry to turn my previously lighthearted spot into more sadness, but this past week, Norwegian swimmer, Alexander Dale Oen, died at the unfairly young age of 26.  While, it is unfortunate when anyone dies, especially someone at such an early age, it is even more disheartening as Oen's win at last year's World Championships in the 100 m breaststroke came only three days after the terrorist attack.  It was a glimmer of the beauty that this country is possible of producing in the face of its most ugly, vile capabilities.  Just a brief tour of Youtube/Google/Facebook will show just what he meant to this country.  Oen's accomplishment will, and should, never be forgotten.

Alt for Norge

Seriously, Where are you Spring?

Thank you, bushes for ignoring the "spring is cancelled this year" memo

As I haven't seen the sun in about a week (give or take, its hard to keep track of the days here as the sky is like a perpetual gray and its cold.  So, yes, Oslo does resemble "The Road" slightly), OSLOst in space may seem a little gloomy this week.

I knew I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up with the 20+ degree weather of March, but, seriously, its almost May (On a side note:  Labor Day here (May Day) is supposed to be cray... we shall see), stop playin', Oslo.  Make with the Spring.

As always, it could be worse.

Last year, it snowed the first week of May.

While that isn't likely (though, This is Norway!, anything poor weather related is possible), the situation isn't completely ruined.  First, there are a serious of pretty, yellow bushes that are springing up virtually all over the city.  Which, is awesome... It at least looks spring-like.  Additionally, there are these funky, little birds that keep popping up everywhere.  They seem like they're ready to get down with the chirping and looking all tough.  While they're no Blue Jay or Oriole, they're definitely way better looking than crows (we don't need a picture of a crow... just think of an ugly bird).  Yes, I just wasted 80 minutes of my life trying to figure out the bird's name.  It's a European Magpie.  Not necessarily the most glamorous of names (but, it does explain why Newcastle is called the magpies... I thought that was just British slang for cake eater.  Yes, I spent another 20 minutes looking up "Mighty Ducks" related stories.  Don't judge).

I don't eat cake!  The Knucklepuck was overrated and the most improbable thing outside of Kennan Thompson passing as an athlete... jus' sayin'

Anyway, the European Magpie, in addition to being a rather common bird, is one of the most intelligent animals.  It's intellect rivals chimpanzees and Boston sports team fans... So, it's reappearance here totally suggests that Spring must be coming soon.  This fowl ain't no fool... it wouldn't stray this far north unless it had figured out that Spring was coming and it was time to pick out the best nesting/pimp pad spots.

Our little hope seizes upon little things...

Another positive is that the sun is staying up later... Well, I assume its staying up later.  The sky is staying light gray longer in the day (8:30!) than it had previous to daylight savings (oh, did you know that Europe and North America have different daylight savings dates?  Me neither!  It seems that there was a fortnight in March where five hours separated the East Coast and Oslo.  It is one of the most inexplicable, odd things that I've come across... which is really saying something.)

Though, the uplifting seems to keep coming.  Over forty thousand people gathered in the Youngstorget Square to sing the Norwegian version of "We are the World" (The song is called "Children of the Rainbow", click on the title for the lyrics.  Then copy and paste in translate.google.com!) as an offering that the nation is more than just the hateful acts and ideas of July 22, 2011.

Despite all of my jokes and irreverence and sheep videos, this truly encapsulates the identity of Norway.  So, I will leave that as my last note for this post.

Alt for Norge

Norway's Bovine University

Since I have been in Norway, one of the most reoccurring questions I get from Norwegians are "Do movies accurately depict American life? While that is kind of a crazy question (I almost don't bring up the fact that I lived in Baltimore lest I be lambasted with "The Wire" questions... Though, that's something I'm asked by anyone who has never been Charm City) the other prominent query is totally legitimate. 

"What is the most noticeable difference between Norway and America?" 

Obviously, the language is the first and foremost, but, most Norwegians speak English (to varying degrees... but that's another blog entry).  There are numerous websites that will try and detail the major differences, but, for me, it comes down to food.

In addition to being one of the best Troy McClure shorts from, arguably, the best Simpsons' episode ever (Lisa becomes a Vegetarian... you still don't win friends with salad!), it is a great satire on the American cattle industry.  Like all satire, definition-alert, it is grounded in truth (see: pink slime).  We, as Americans, will eat anything with proper condiments on it.  One of my new teammates, who is also from the states, recently related an antidote about buying burgers back home that were so saturated, they actually ripped through the bag (I won't name the chain that it came from for fear of legal action... *cough* Golden Arches *cough*).

Conversely, here in Norway, the standards for the cattle industry, to quote the rapper/poet, Canibus, "are above precision".  The Norwegians only import American animal products that come from a certified EEA facility.  More so, prior to their EEA agreement in the early 2000s, Norway was even crazier about their food standards.  Up until a decade ago, synthetic coloring was banned (there was no yellow 5 scare!) and roughly 1/4 the additive sweeteners were allowed in foods.  Fast forward to today, where everything down to the feed (grass for my cattle!) and welfare (namely, the outdoor time, health monitor, regulation, etc) is extensively outlined in a comprehensive act that is constantly revised to ensure the utmost quality.

I'm not a doctor or a biologist, but I imagine this means the food is probably better for you...

Though, there is a downside... The portions are... uhmm... smaller.

Norwegian Portion

American Portion (I miss you, Alewife)

Though, I'm definitely more of a fan of the nutritional facts included in American food.

American Nutrition Facts... I am constantly checking to make sure I'm getting all my Riboflavin!

I would include the Norwegian version here, but its not really much:  Calories, Protein, Carbohydrates, and Fat.  

Yup... 

Remember to check me out on Facebook (Facebook.com/OSLOst)

Alt for Norge!

Westward, young man... westward

From sea to shin... I mean, Alt for NORGE!!

Well, I survived the mountains and football (read about that experience on my other blog.) and I'm here to tell the tales.

Easter was swell...

Things I've learned about the west coast of Norway:

• It is perpetually cold... even when the sun is shining and the skies are clear (not mutually inclusive items, mind you), it still feels pretty frigid.  The North Sea is unkind, my friend... Though, I hear Vancouver is the same way.
• Before the oil, there were a ton of smith-working there.  In fact, the copper used in the statue of liberty came from mines in this region.
• Winter tires are no joke.  They're heavy and are necessary... 

Blinding snow is no match for winterized tires!

It was great to eat some of the traditional, Norwegian Easter food (Lamb!) and see some of the nice statues along the beautiful harbors here.

I'm trying to help him lift the fish... I know, it looks weird

And, here are some of the other pictures of the beautiful, Norwegian landscape from the 7-hour cross country driving extravaganza!

Over the mountains and through the tundra...

My favorite picture of the whole trip... You can literally see where the tree line ends and where Winter is winning the war with Spring

Lonely cabin... I'm going to wager that there isn't indoor plumbing there

The car's thermometer read -2 C... which is "quite cold" in Fahrenheit.   Check out the frozen, natural spring to the left

Up in the clouds like Darwin Deez (obscure musical reference alert!)

your humble host...

While I got the point right, I wasn't able to erase the goofy expression on my face.  Oh well...

And that's that... Otherwise, its nothing that hasn't been told before.  Awkward reunions of friends with new (or added) significant others where everyone makes small talk or plays "remember when..." or gossips.  I find these times are vital for drinking beer and practicing my understanding Norwegian skills... one of those went really well and one of those went not as well.  I'll let you guess on that one...

Alt for Norge

Snapshots from a short week

Ok... Since the Easter holiday is coming up (Spring Holiday Season for my non-Christian friends... God Påske), that means traveling for me and no regular post for you.  I know, tragic.  To ameliorate and assuage, I'm doing a mini-post.

Pictures!  LOOK!

SMAK!

Here is a random bag of potato chips that my girlfriend/samboer/cohabitant/partner-in-mischief/brown derby debutante/maker of awesome foods like my cheesesteak from last post, purchased.  These are not the "Ramen-flavored" chips of legend... though, they're pretty good, too.  (On a side note, I have found that "Paprika" is like a dual encompassing word here to capture both the red and green peppers, while in bell-form, and the spice that comes from said peppers being rendered into ground form, plus chili pepper... yes, I had to look that up because I had no idea how Paprika was made, either).

Speaking of the lady, on Saturday, she took me to a concert of one of my new favorite artist, Jonas Alaska.  I'm choosing to term him as "Indie Folk" and "awesome"... Here, have a listen for yourself.

yes, I understand why some of you are going, "Dude, he sounds like a Norwegian Conor Oberst".  If you don't get that reference, consider yourself either "old" or "too cool for school", but not both... (fine, I will allow for a "I'm not American" to be another option, too)


I got a new haircut... there really isn't anything funny or noteworthy to remark about it, just thought I should mention.  You can check it out below.  Yes, I feel like it makes me look like I should be in YoungMoneyCashMoney, too... I hope I'd be more Tyga than Drake :(...

No, I'm not in Marvin's Room.  Yes, that is Irish Spring Body Wash in the background...  I don't have to defend it

So yeah... enjoy the next 10 days.  When I check back in, you will have known that I survived the holiday (the trip consists of transversing the treacherous, snow-covered, Norwegian mountainous region) and the subsequent return to American Football (long story... probably will be told in detail on my other blog).

Happy Holidays!!

Alt for Norge