So yeah... you're probably like "wait... didn't there use to be awesome blog entries on this page like twice a month?" (well, a boy can dream...). You're right. I took a break. Like from Norway. I was in exile in America (details aren't really all that interesting or uncommon), but now I'm back.
Were they happy to see me?
You could say so...
In any case, I thought I'd shape my first return entry with what I did in America. However, I figured that would be antithetical of what this blog should be about (really, it wasn't that much fun), I started writing this to detail about how I found the moods of Norway. So, I returned earlier this week and, like the two times before, I immediately became sick.
Not like, sick sick, but sick enough that my stomach felt like Prince Harry was throwing a party inside it. Before, I had chalked it up to excitement (my first time!!) or stopping over in Iceland, but this time there was no direct cause (of course I was excited, stay with me here). I decided to start looking in to a red thread... a similarity between each of the trips. Finally, after ruling out the insane (global conspiracy to force me to stay in America where I will become a manchurian candidate and bring about world war 3) and the plausible (air pollution withdrawal), I figured it either came down to my girlfriend making me sick (I'm allergic to adorableness!) or the one thing I'd had each time. Water. That's right, in an ironic twist, the most essential thing I needed was making me sick.
A short search confirmed my fears. Over 22 percent of the water pipes were made between 1941 and 1970s?!? Imagine how far technology has come sense then! Would you trust your life to a car made between 1941 and 1970s everyday on your commute to and from work? This is awful!! I'm going to need a Brita and to boil the water I bathe myself in. Or maybe a britta filter to tape to the shower head.
What's this? A detailed study and it says that the "22% water pipe" thing refers to an estimate done in 2010, and, of those pipes, the majority are secondary piping in rural regions and, subsequently, there have been over 10,000 projects a year to fix the problem.
Attention American, High School Seniors (and those that were high school seniors at one point, even if it was way back in '99), congratulations on graduating! However, as you embark on Senior Week, know that while you might think your week-long, dalliance at the beach or having crazy house parties with Matt Damon are the ultimate, you're mistaken.
The Basics. The period of celebration for graduating Norwegians is referred to as Russefeiring and those that participate in it are Russ(not to be confused with Rus, which means intoxication from drugs...). The word Russ derives from the latin cornua depositurus, which means "bound to put aside one's horns" and is synonymous with many Scandinavian University Acceptance ceremonies (sinister legend suggests that during the time of "union" with Denmark, when Norwegian students attended The University of Copenhagen, snarky Danish students made them wear horns to denote their more "rural roots". The Danes are mean). Either way, there have been Russ, in some form or another, for a couple hundred years.
That sounds kinda gangster, but how can that compete with beer bonging and party hopping on the beach?
For starters, the period last longer than a week as it stretches from May 1 (May Day) to the National Constitution Day on the 17th. Secondly, since the school structure is different here (Norwegian "middle school" is four years long), most Seniors are 19 when they graduate or, if they're precocious or born in the back half of the year, 18. The drinking age in Norway is 18 (for beer and wine, 20 for hard liquor... but whoever waits?). No fake I.D. needed.
But they don't even have beer pong, how much fun can it even be?
It looks like a blast. For starters, the whole "rural roots" thing gains traction here. The customary clothing are overalls (yes, everyone and yes, they wear them for the duration of the 17 day period... it's frowned upon to wash them... in fact, if you get caught, they make you caught off a leg of the overalls), for everyone. Boys and Girls. They also have different colors depending on the course of study going forward. Blue are for the Business kids, Black for Engineers, Green for Agriculture (the most rare of the Russ), and, for everyone else, Red. Additionally, to discourage drunk driving, its customary for Russ to pay for transportation. Not just any kind of transportation, but a tricked out bus. You think your prom limo was fly, these busses can cost upwards of a quarter million US Dollars (think part RV, part tour bus).
Where does the money come from? You get sponsors, of course!
LEGO man gotta beer!
Or, your parents are just Oslo Ballerz and you and your friends just pool your allowances for it.
Either way, kids race around after school (that's right, these kids party and bomb out of their mind WHILE SCHOOL IS STILL GOING ON... they haven't even graduated yet. They still have to take exams, which is in mid-June) going from party to party (The first weekend in May, there's a huge party in Stavanger) or creating their own.
Ringnes and Hansa for all
There are actually prizes for having the best bus. The whole thing isn't a complete loss because most Russ recoup a sizable portion of their investment by reselling the bus the following year to the next set of Russ.
Aww, crap... I give up. Are there anything else that they do that should make me hate my life or try to pose as an exchange student?
Instead of getting those wallet-size graduation pictures to hand out (There's a drawer at my parent's house that contains about a dozen of them along with my junior prom pictures... poor investment), Russ have mock business cards that they hand out to anyone that, if you clink the link you will see, contain a picture and a whole bunch of zany tidbits. I think when I found out about this, I spent a few days trying to figure out what my cards would say.
So yeah... I won't say this often, but Norway wins. Hands Down.
"Like" the OSLOst in Space on Facebook (Facebook.com/oslost)
This past week something unprecedented happened here in Oslo. Four, major North American icons descended upon town (Not to mention the 50,000 crazed Norwegians that packed Valle-Hovin for a Metallica show on the preceding Wednesday). Kanye West, Jay-Z,Justin Bieber, and Hillary Rodham Clinton (yes, she still counts as an icon). To make matters even crazier, Oslo was the epicenter for one of the most widespread public sector strikes in years which saw "over 300 police officers" pulled. That may not seem like such a high number, by its self, but, when put in perspective (there's only 11,000 employees in the Police Service... for the WHOLE COUNTRY), it's downright staggering.
So yes... things were a little crazy here.
Oslo had a severe case of Bieber Fever
Here's a quick, run back to how it all went down.
MONDAY
While those of you back in the US celebrated Memorial Day (Or, as it should be known in Europe, "You're welcome" Day... Joking! Joking! Calm down), here in Oslo, Watch the Throne day fell on the state church holiday of "Pentecost". Things were relatively quiet around town as people took advantage of the three day weekend and splendid weather to go to their cabins in the country-side or down to the beaches in the Oslo Fjord. Norwegians love for getting out into nature combined with the advantageous concert location (Telenor Arena... located in the Fornebu region of Greater Oslo. Which is as close to the heart of the city like Fed Ex Field is to downtown DC, Candlestick Park is to downtown San Francisco) lead to a relatively non-influenced day. There was extra traffic and people congestion down by the National Theatre area as it was tipped off that that's where the two stars were staying in a hotel there (maybe the two floors of blocked out rooms was a giveaway). There concert went off without much incident (No excessive repetition of songs) and they were able to get out of town. Which, as it turned out, would be for the best
TUESDAY
Maybe I'm out of touch with popular culture (ok... I am out of touch with popular culture), but I had NO idea just how big Justin Bieber had become, especially here in Norway. Before his plane could touch down at Oslo International (Gardermoen is not exactly JFK or Dulles), thousands were camped out waiting to just get a view of their idol. Things only got more nuts as the day continued. My bus had to go through the heart of the Bieberness (Jerbanetorget... the central station and right next to the hotel the Biebs was staying). What was normally a 20 minute ride was rendered into an hour slog as an inordinate number of people and cars were literally parked out on the streets around the area hoping to see Bieber. How bad was the situation? Bieber had to be airlifted from the hotel to a floating stage behind the Opera house in the harbor where he was to perform. Were there a lot of fans there waiting?
Things only got more bananas after the show, when young Justin tried to move through the streets toward a scheduled press conference and all hell broke loose amongst the thousands of excited, teenage girls
Now, besides the fact that there are quite a few guys chasing the cars, the shocking lack of police cannot be overstated. They underestimated well... everything. The result were over 45 people injured in the melee and one cancelled press conference. Oh, by the way, when I was attempting to come home well after this whole scene at around 11pm, it still took nearly double the normal time. Bieber FTW.
FRIDAY
Well, Hillary seems happy to be here. I asked a handful of people through the street and around the Royal Palace what their thoughts were about the Secretary of State coming through (she was handing out "thanks a lot!" for NATO support, as opposed to other countries who didn't contribute as much as others *cough* Germany *cough*). The answers I got were really insightful:
"She's here? Like now?"
"I wish it was her husband instead."
"Is Obama coming, too? No? Oh..."
That's right, world... Oslo has taken your best shot from the celebrity world and, like a erstwhile, British orphan, they're asking for some more. Bring on the POTUS! Norway is ready...
May 17th is sorta an important day in Norway... ok, ok, ok. It's THE MOST important day in Norway. Since Norway has always been, more or less, an independent nation (or rather grouping of marauding Vikings... whichever term you prefer), it treats the day the Constitution (or most recent iteration of their government) was signed (1814, if you're keeping track at home) as their day to celebrate all things Norway. Ever since I arrived here, I have been, constantly, told that "nothing compares to it" that it is amazing and quite the spectacle (in a good way).
You know what? It was a pretty dope affair.
The first thing that caught my attention were the parades... oh, the parades. There were three altogether. Children's, Adult, and Military. We opted for the children's version and were witness to ALL the children of Oslo. Oslo is a little smaller than Baltimore (or Seattle) so, as you can imagine, that's a lot of kids. They each had the banner from their school, or social group, and each kid was waving a flag. The parade route went all the way to the Royal Palace where the King, himself, greeted each participant from his balcony several stories up. The crowd joined in singing along to the national anthem (seriously, that thing has like a dozen verses) and random shouts of "hip hip hooray!". In the distance, the Akers Fortress cannon fired off a few dozen times to let us know that the celebration was on.
As you can see in my video, there were a lot of people here to see the parade and celebrate the National Day. It felt like every person in the greater Oslo area turned up and I can, honestly, say that there have been few other events I have attended where there were more people.
Another fun part of the day is that its tradition to eat ice cream and sausages. Fine by me, after about ten minutes, I had a strawberry ice cream in one hand and a sausage in potato wrap in the other standing shoulder to shoulder with my new countrymen. Many of them had on the traditional bunad while, a lot like me, were just in suits (though, other traditional clothing was welcome... there were a fair amount of dashikis).
This guy won the award for best bunad... oh, I'm mean mugging someone who cut in front of my picture... Norwegians can be jerks
Though, the highlight of the day (ok... one of the highlights. The Russ impromptu dance party was pretty awesome, too. I promise to write an article about that on Friday) was attending an international function after the parade. There was free champagne and really good finger food (really, REALLY good shrimp). Oh, did I mention the champagne was free?
Altogether, it really gave me some perspective on this odd nation. Sure, Norwegians may be reserved and inwardly focused, but they love their own country and coming together to celebrate it. While I still feel somewhat apart from this place and have questions than answers, at times, I understand celebrating your history and hopes for the future. Seeing all the other people, of various ethnic backgrounds, gave me a sense that there was room here for everyone willing to do their part. I look forward to my next May 17th and I hope that it happens here in Oslo.
I know I usually make new posts on Friday, but, due to traveling we're going to pretend like today is Friday (I'm sure many of you wish that was the case). So what's new? Oh, I spent the weekend in Stavanger (or, as I like to call it, the 'Vanger).
That may be the entire population of the 'Vanger in this picture!
It was a pleasant flight (around an hour) in which I learned that "Never Let Me Down" is the best Kanye West song (Spotify!!!). Very important information.
Anyway, the 'Vanger is a sleepy, coastal town (The most reoccurring, apt description of it that came to me was "a beach town without a beach", but, as it was later pointed out, there were small beaches all around... so there's that). It also has a lot of diversity (by Norwegian standards), and its reflected all throughout the city. Despite the fact that it has over 100,000 people, it never felt like more than a few hundred, but it didn't take an inordinate amount of time to go to any point in town. Unfortunately, bad weather kept me from going out to Pulpit Rock, which is a real shame as I'm told that its better than the Grand Canyon (strangely, none of the Norwegians who told me this had been to the Grand Canyon, but, since I didn't make it to the PR, I can't weigh in, either).
Cannonballs are strongly discouraged
That's pretty much all there is to say about... oh, right. They have a bit of oil. Ok. A lot of oil. So much, in fact, that its drawn a lot of international companies (most notably, Haliburton and ConocoPhillips) as well as "international, sister cities" (which, I think is akin to having followers on Twitter).
However, it wasn't all ballerific. As I previously mentioned, the hundred thousand or so 'vangerians are spread out, but, unlike in Oslo, there wasn't much in the way of public transportation to connect them. Which meant a lot of driving and taxis (which escalated in price quite quickly). Also, as previously mentioned in this space, the North Sea goes hammer and that means unseasonable weather... How unseasonable? you may ask...
It snowed.
Multiple times.
It wasn't a rarity, either.
All I could think about was my last post (how's this for irony, almost the entirety of last week here in Oslo had 70+ fahrenheit temperature... seems my blog questions get answered!) and realize that I never had it so well...
Remember to "like" me on Facebook (Facebook.com/OSLOst).
Sorry to turn my previously lighthearted spot into more sadness, but this past week, Norwegian swimmer, Alexander Dale Oen, died at the unfairly young age of 26. While, it is unfortunate when anyone dies, especially someone at such an early age, it is even more disheartening as Oen's win at last year's World Championships in the 100 m breaststroke came only three days after the terrorist attack. It was a glimmer of the beauty that this country is possible of producing in the face of its most ugly, vile capabilities. Just a brief tour of Youtube/Google/Facebook will show just what he meant to this country. Oen's accomplishment will, and should, never be forgotten.
Thank you, bushes for ignoring the "spring is cancelled this year" memo
As I haven't seen the sun in about a week (give or take, its hard to keep track of the days here as the sky is like a perpetual gray and its cold. So, yes, Oslo does resemble "The Road" slightly), OSLOst in space may seem a little gloomy this week.
I knew I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up with the 20+ degree weather of March, but, seriously, its almost May (On a side note: Labor Day here (May Day) is supposed to be cray... we shall see), stop playin', Oslo. Make with the Spring.
As always, it could be worse.
Last year, it snowed the first week of May.
While that isn't likely (though, This is Norway!, anything poor weather related is possible), the situation isn't completely ruined. First, there are a serious of pretty, yellow bushes that are springing up virtually all over the city. Which, is awesome... It at least looks spring-like. Additionally, there are these funky, little birds that keep popping up everywhere. They seem like they're ready to get down with the chirping and looking all tough. While they're no Blue Jay or Oriole, they're definitely way better looking than crows (we don't need a picture of a crow... just think of an ugly bird). Yes, I just wasted 80 minutes of my life trying to figure out the bird's name. It's a European Magpie. Not necessarily the most glamorous of names (but, it does explain why Newcastle is called the magpies... I thought that was just British slang for cake eater. Yes, I spent another 20 minutes looking up "Mighty Ducks" related stories. Don't judge).
I don't eat cake! The Knucklepuck was overrated and the most improbable thing outside of Kennan Thompson passing as an athlete... jus' sayin'
Anyway, the European Magpie, in addition to being a rather common bird, is one of the most intelligent animals. It's intellect rivals chimpanzees and Boston sports team fans... So, it's reappearance here totally suggests that Spring must be coming soon. This fowl ain't no fool... it wouldn't stray this far north unless it had figured out that Spring was coming and it was time to pick out the best nesting/pimp pad spots.
Our little hope seizes upon little things...
Another positive is that the sun is staying up later... Well, I assume its staying up later. The sky is staying light gray longer in the day (8:30!) than it had previous to daylight savings (oh, did you know that Europe and North America have different daylight savings dates? Me neither! It seems that there was a fortnight in March where five hours separated the East Coast and Oslo. It is one of the most inexplicable, odd things that I've come across... which is really saying something.)
Though, the uplifting seems to keep coming. Over forty thousand people gathered in the Youngstorget Square to sing the Norwegian version of "We are the World" (The song is called "Children of the Rainbow", click on the title for the lyrics. Then copy and paste in translate.google.com!) as an offering that the nation is more than just the hateful acts and ideas of July 22, 2011.
Despite all of my jokes and irreverence and sheep videos, this truly encapsulates the identity of Norway. So, I will leave that as my last note for this post.
Since I have been in Norway, one of the most reoccurring questions I get from Norwegians are "Do movies accurately depict American life? While that is kind of a crazy question (I almost don't bring up the fact that I lived in Baltimore lest I be lambasted with "The Wire" questions... Though, that's something I'm asked by anyone who has never been Charm City) the other prominent query is totally legitimate.
"What is the most noticeable difference between Norway and America?"
Obviously, the language is the first and foremost, but, most Norwegians speak English (to varying degrees... but that's another blog entry). There are numerous websites that will try and detail the major differences, but, for me, it comes down to food.
In addition to being one of the best Troy McClure shorts from, arguably, the best Simpsons' episode ever (Lisa becomes a Vegetarian... you still don't win friends with salad!), it is a great satire on the American cattle industry. Like all satire, definition-alert, it is grounded in truth (see: pink slime). We, as Americans, will eat anything with proper condiments on it. One of my new teammates, who is also from the states, recently related an antidote about buying burgers back home that were so saturated, they actually ripped through the bag (I won't name the chain that it came from for fear of legal action... *cough* Golden Arches *cough*).
